“I want to be a boxer!” her 6-year-old girl exclaimed the moment they stepped out of the theater. She just smiled and said ‘Sure! Whatever you wish to be.’ They had just stepped out of the movie theater after watching ‘Mary Kom’ – A biopic about 5 time World Champion Indian boxer. Her daughter’s dreams changed every quarter if not early.
It was some time later that she started hearing comments from friends and relatives. “You should guide your daughter about the choices she makes in life”, they said. “You should coax her to be good in studies and some extracurricular activities, catch them young! They don’t understand what they want, it needs our push and determination.” She heard it all, never argued but never agreed either. She knew in her heart, her daughter could be anything she wished to be and she will support her in every way possible.
Today, as she entered the room she saw her daughter worried. She had a scholarship letter from a foreign university that was offering full scholarship in design stream and the other she had a letter from a college offering her a degree in engineering. “What do I do? Dad wants me to be an engineer and I know I won’t be bad in it, but here I have a scholarship and design internship opportunities in the best studios around the world!”
Her daughter was brilliant and she knew she could do both. But she wasn’t sure what would make her happy. She held her daughters hand and asked “What do you want?” Mom why don’t you ever tell me what I should do? snapped her daughter, a little angry. “I need direction because I am confused!” “Do you or do you want to base your decision on popular choice? she enquired. “Remember, if you ask others, it will be what they want, their ambitions, their dreams, and their expectations. You will be carrying the weight of all that if you base your decision on their choices. And if you fail, you will blame others for the way your life shaped up. I don’t want that for you.” Her daughter was stunned at the simplicity with which her mother said this. Her daughter always assumed her mother to be unassuming. Not someone who could lecture on self-worth and determination. She smiled and said, “The day you were born, I made a promise to myself that I will not let the burden of others expectations and ambitions straddle you. And I will continue to be true to my promise. Her daughter had tears in her eyes. Hugging her tightly she said “Close your eyes, focus only on what your heart wants and the rest will come to you.”
Tweet: Close your eyes, focus only on what your heart wants and the rest will come to you.